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5 Powerful Secrets About Strap Ons You Need To Read

Strap Ons have a strange and shrouded history, but the internet has brought them into the light. In this post we reveal 5 incredible secrets about these toys that make them quite normal to use.

A lot of women enjoy using harnessed dildos on their significant others. While this may not have been the case 50 years ago, it certainly is the case now – and we’re not sure the data on the fifties and sixties is accurate! One thing is for sure, these harnesses are here to stay.

Unfortunately because of closed attitudes to sexual exploration and discovery, this particular sex toy has been called a lot of names. It does not have the best reputation in adult toy land. Our hope is to help rehabilitate the perception around the strap-on dildo, so that you can rock them guilt free.

A big part of this is exposing the myths that conservative thinkers perpetuate about these toys, while at the same time shining a bright light on any secrets that you should know about them.

This post is for women who want to find out what these 5 powerful secrets about strap ons mean.

The History of Strap On Use Uncovered

According to Lori over at Thatposition.com, a blog about all things sex toy related, strap ons have risen to prominence again since Dr Carol Queen’s videos called ‘Bend Over Boyfriend’ came out in 1998.

In truth, people have been experimenting with different types of dildos that are somehow harnessed to themselves for thousands of years. The earliest known relic is a double phallic-shaped baton with a hole in the centre – theoretically speaking, where the straps would go.

Many strap ons have appeared throughout history in Egyptian, Japanese and Greek art, and tales of them exist in literature and poetry. Of course, when Dr Queen’s videos went live – the spotlight once again shone on this often misunderstood and irrationally feared sex toy.

At the same time online shopping was being born, which gave people like you unprecedented access to interesting sex toys and sexual information that you previously didn’t know about. Of course strap on sales steadily climbed, and harnesses evolved to suit the needs of the many.

Best strap on secrets women
Best strap on secrets women… ssh

So you see, you are not ‘strange’ or ‘abnormal’ for finding strap ons sexy and interesting – quite the opposite. You are simply part of a growing culture of adults that love to get the most out of their sexual experiences by adding modern toys and technology to their lives.

Now, here are those 5 powerful secrets that you need to know right away!

#1: The StrapOn is One of The Most Popular Toys In The World

According to a recent study by Statisticbrain, 4% of all sex toy sales online are strap ons and harnesses. That means that it’s the 8th most popular toy in the world right now, more popular than furry handcuffs!

So, why can women joke about using a novelty item like faux fur handcuffs, but do the same about a strap on and instantly be labelled a pervert with a secretly gay partner? It makes no sense, and quite frankly it comes down to antiquated thinking.

Strap ons are not going anywhere. There will always be thousands of women in the world that find pegging sexy and want to do it.

According to Dodai Stewart on Jezebel.com, Pegging is the name given to normal heterosexual women that enjoy penetrating their normal heterosexual male partner with a strap-on dildo or dong.

It’s a gender-bending act to be sure, but that’s why it is so appealing to many women. You get to experience the power of penetrating him, for a change! What’s not to like?

Happy couple in bed waiting for best strap on sex
Happy couple in bed waiting for best strap on sex

#2: These Toys Are Not Exclusively For Lesbian and BDSM Communities

Strap ons have long been considered sex toys for women who are in lesbian relationships. After all, this is where the gear seems to make the most sense. Girl on girl, with a toy involved for penetration equals a strap-on – simple.

Likewise, the BDSM community has always used these toys in power plays, some in very extreme, very gross ways. The myth persists that the strap on dildo is only for lesbian couples or extreme fetish play. The big secret is that this is a total lie! Both men and women use strap ons for penetrative sex, men as a way to extend their size and women as a form of convenient anal play with their male partners.

Sexual health blogger Colin Adamo, argues that pegging is actually one of the better sex acts that couples can do together. He says that it does not demean the woman, and that it is an innocent, monogamous way of creating intimacy, powerful orgasms and expanding anal play.

#3: Using a Strap On is Extremely Pleasurable For Both People Involved

Dildos of all shapes, sizes and functions can fit into a harness which means that both partners will enjoy the pleasure that comes from using strap ons. Some are double ended, some vibrate and even if they don’t there is always friction.

The truth is that many women are extremely aroused by pegging, to the point where they naturally orgasm while they are performing the act. Because of this, it becomes a mutually beneficial form of foreplay that you and your lover can indulge in, which happens to be a little bit different.

If your man loves anal play, and you could use more foreplay in your life – then using a range of strap ons will be an exciting and exhilarating change of pace.

Best strap on harness with dong
Best strap on harness with dong

#4: Taking Part in Any Kind of Pegging Does Not Make You Gay

For some reason, caveman mentality exists where the innocent strap on is concerned. Surely if a man enjoys being penetrated he must be gay! And if a woman likes wearing a harness, she must want to be a man – which also makes her gay. It’s ridiculous!

One of the most common fears when using strap ons is that performing the act will somehow change a perfectly normal straight man into a gay man. This kind of mentality belongs back in the 1980’s; it certainly doesn’t have a place in today’s progressive sexual environment.

Sexual orientation has nothing to do with a strap on, any more than using an anal plug or beads do. You can absolutely be straight as an arrow and love anal play, it’s perfectly normal.

  • Check out our non-realistic strap on kit for beginners here.

#5: All StrapOns When Used Correctly Are Painless and Fun

Thanks to the BDSM myths that have given strap ons a bad name, people believe that using them is a form of abuse or extreme punishment that is incredibly painful. This myth is perpetrated by pornography no doubt that paints all female strap on users as evil dominatrices.

Like any sex toy used specifically for anal play, it comes with a strict set of rules so that pain doesn’t happen. Of course if you try and treat a bum like a vagina, things are not going to go well. Rectal stimulation and preparation are key in any pegging exchange.

According to Xandria, an online sex toy retailer, in the past 10 years they have seen a 300% increase in the number of heterosexual couples using a strap on for anal sex. This would not be the case if the practice was persistently painful.

Happy couples know about the best strap on plays
Happy couples know about the best strap on plays

The Future of Pegging Is a Bright One

Has your mind been blown yet? Truth can be a funny thing. While pegging will probably always be an alternative sexual practice, it is no stranger than mild bondage or vibrating anal play. You don’t have to feel like a pervert because these fantastic strap ons interest you!

We hope that these powerful secrets have eased your concerns over buying a strap on. It’s never okay to feel like what turns you on is something bad, especially when it’s within the context of a completely consensual, monogamous relationship where love and intimacy thrive.

Now the only question that remains should be, “Which Strapon should I buy?” At Désir we stock a range of 100% body safe dildos and dongs that can be used in harnesses. We also have some great entry level strap on harnesses for sale. The secret is out – pegging is perfectly normal couple’s fun!

What Do You Think?

Thank you for reading our post, we hope you found it helpful. In the spirit of our mission we have one more thing to ask you! Do you know any secrets about strapons that you would like to share with us? Any myths that have kept you from trying one out that we didn’t mention? You can leave us a message on our adult shop contact us page or your can leave a comment below. We would really appreciate your feedback and input.

About Jade

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I am the Operations Manager at Désir & feel so privileged to have been a part of this adventure from the very beginning, conceptualizing and building our amazing lingerie and sex toy ranges. Having a Diploma in Business Analysis my aim is to assist in the streamlining of processes, thereby ensuring maximum efficiency, remaining relevant by keeping up to date with trends, and producing statistical analysis in order to meet our consumer’s needs.

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