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What Can Sexy Lingerie Do For Your Relationship this Valentines Day?

Sexy lingerie worn by both men and women in a relationship can turn waning arousal into heated passion. In this post, we discover exactly how dressing for sex can get things back on track.

Intimate apparel women in lingerie
Intimate apparel, women in lingerie.

Long term relationships all suffer from the same ailment. It’s not that the person you love has become less sexy. It’s not that you have lost interest in seeing them naked. You have just adjusted to life with another person, and now – what was once fiery hot has turned into cold ash.Most of the time when your lover locks eyes with you in the bedroom, it’s after a long day at work. You’re tired, your hair is drooping and you’ve donned your finest pair of mismatched but incredibly comfortable pyjamas – which in retrospect are the opposite of sexy.

You don’t look your best. You don’t even look interested because they are also wearing old non-sexy pyjamas. What has happened to you! Hot lingerie can revive your sex appeal and infuse your sex life with something that has been missing for a long time – excitement, possibility and new sensations.

In this post we take a close up look at how men and women can use sexy lingerie to reignite passion between the sheets.

Ladies: This Is Why Your Man Loves Lingerie

If you, like so many other women, think of lingerie as a special occasion item – you’re wrong. In fact
lingerie is so much more than that, and what it communicates to your man when you wear it will change your mind on that fact forever.

In a hilarious, but authentically relevant study conducted at Concordia University in Montreal – rats were trained to prefer mates that wore tiny little jackets. The study sought to understand why men love sexy lingerie so much.

During the tests virgin male rats were only allowed to mate with rats that wore these little jackets. When released into the general rat test group which was mixed, the males automatically chose to mate again with the jacket-wearing rats.

This is because the rats learned that when they visually saw the jackets, they were going to have sex. The study also found that the rats that mated with the jacket wearing females were happier after sex and more excited in general.

The researchers concluded that rats can learn to associate clothing textures with excitement, imminent pleasure and sex. Theoretically speaking, the same thing is possible with your man. Sexy lingerie triggers a desire response, an automated excitement and anticipation for sex.

Because of this scientific explanation, it stands to reason that if you match certain items of lingerie with specific acts of sex, your lover will learn to respond in a favourable way every time.

Intimate apparel posing confidently in sexy clothing
Intimate apparel posing confidently in sexy clothing.

Dressing For Sexy Success

Sex toys for couples promote intimacy and improve relationships – this has been proven through many studies conducted over the years. The question is – how can sexy lingerie remain special if you wear it often?

Also Read:  15 Sex Toys For Couples Who Want To Try New Things

Because ladies, that it the goal. You want to look nice in bed more often than you do, if you really want to invest yourself in a good sex life. Having pancakes every day is great, but it will get boring – unless twice a week you have pancakes with chocolate sauce, then you look forward to it.

  • Sexy lingerie is not all the same. There are many different types of materials and you can match these to specific plays in the bedroom or feelings that you want to promote in your partner. Black leather for example, goes well with bondage sessions.
  • As you consider different materials, think of different styles as well. Corset and lace styles are incredible for romantic foreplay to enhance the visual sensations your partner will experience as they are giving you pleasure. This is when sexy lingerie works with arousal.
  • As a rule pepper lingerie days between your normal pyjama days. If you’re feeling like a certain kind of sex play, dress for it to communicate to him how you are feeling. You will instantly get the right response for the right play over time.

Men are a lot more visual than women are, which is why this kind of thing tends to work. But women can appreciate male sexy lingerie as well. Beyond that – dressing for sex also prepares you for the excitement that is coming, and it amplifies your excitement, confidence and sex drive.

Intimate apparel sexy items for men
Intimate apparel sexy items for men.

5 Ways Lingerie Improves Your Sex Life

According to Kait Scalisi, a sex and relationship coach, there are very good reasons why when you buy a new piece of lingerie you tend to have better sex for a while.

#1: Lingerie is empowering. When you wear it you feel sexy, and so you behave in a way that sexually attracts the opposite sex. It’s a kind of private exhibitionism especially for your lover, with the guarantee of a good time waiting at the end of it.

#2: New lingerie plays on the mind. Sexy lingerie tends to stick in the memory of a man that has had a good time the night before. The thought of having another experience like the previous one is a turn on for many men, and that item of lingerie is the source of this interest.

#3: Lingerie puts you in the mood. Lace and satin heighten sexual sensations in ways that we have barely begun to understand. Feeling sexy and beautiful automatically improves your appetite for sex and your arousal levels start to climb. Catching his eye does the rest.

#4: It brings something new into the bedroom. What is great sex without a bit of mystery? A quick and easy way to inspire mystery is to dress in new sexy lingerie. Your man has never seen you in it before, and so the novelty is still fresh. And novelty encourages sexual desire.

#5: It lets you be anything you want to be. Similar to a pair of dark glasses, the right lingerie can add to your personality, enhancing specific features according to what you are dressing for. Black latex boots for example, may make you feel dominant which is perfect for BDSM play.

Woman intimate apparel roleplay
Woman intimate apparel roleplay.

Types of Lingerie and The Moods They Set

By now you have realized that sexy lingerie plays a much bigger role in the bedroom than you previously thought. Having a sexy wardrobe is all part of the experience, so let’s move onto the different moods you can set with your chosen styles and materials.

There are 2 Main Types of Lingerie:

#1 Women’s Lingerie

  • The Feminine Look: Pinks and purples for everyone! If it feels feminine then you’ll want to add it to your ultra girly wardrobe. Great for romance and general couple’s play.
  • The Hardcore Look: Black satin, lace and leather is all the rage with this look, which is great for any kind of play where you are instigating the pleasure or have the power.
  • The Sporty Look: Cotton can be some of the sexiest sexy lingerie, especially when paired with appealing hairstyles. This is good for anytime sex or roleplaying.
  • The Roleplaying Look: Dress to pretend and roleplay your way into your man’s heart. Excellent for classic outfits like ‘the nurse’ and ‘the police woman.’
  • The Refined Look: Sexy lingerie can also be upmarket and refined, and in this instance you can dress it up to look your best. Satin chic is great for ultra-special occasions like weddings.

Also Read: The Désir Guide to Different Types of Sexy Lingerie

Look At Me Yolande 2 Piece Crotchless Set – Demoniq Lingerie

Look At Me Yolande 2 Piece Crotchless Set - Demoniq Lingerie

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Alcyone Floral 2 Piece Set – Anais

Alcyone Floral 2 Piece Set - Anais

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Brida Bra, Thong & Garter Set – Passion Lingerie

Brida Bra, Thong & Garter Set - Passion Lingerie

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Loraine Corset – Passion Lingerie

Loraine Corset - Passion Lingerie

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Jade 2 Piece Corset – Anais

Jade 2 Piece Corset - Anais

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Alexandra Bodysuit – Anais

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#2 Mens Lingerie

Male lingerie is not as complicated as female lingerie, but it can be very attractive and playful. Follow the same rules and match your chosen play to your sexy lingerie outfit to drive her crazy.

If you are a little heavier, mens plus size lingerie is a better investment, and you’ll look just as hot.

For a woman, donning sexy lingerie as a man is a statement to her that says, “I want you and I’m ready to put in the effort to get you.” It’s hard for a woman to turn that kind of advance down, especially when most complain relentlessly about how little effort men put in!

Sexy lingerie can change your life in so many healthy ways. It will increase your sex drive, improve the quality of sex you are having, it promotes intimacy and stimulates a closer bond between the two of you. Lingerie is a relationship saver, and it’s something that both of you will love.

So, ‘Where can I buy lingerie, sexy clothing and other items?’ You can buy them right here on our online shop. We carry some of the most amazing styles sourced from designers all over the world. If your relationship needs some fire, then we encourage you to build up your collection of lingerie.

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No saucy boudoir is complete without a full and diverse range!

For more information on couple’s sex toys, check out our posts on 15 sex toys for couples that want to try new things (aside from lingerie for sex) here, or find out how to roleplay with sexy apparel for the first time here.

What Do You Think?

Thank you for reading our post, we hope you found it helpful. In the spirit of our mission we have one more thing to ask you! What style of lingerie is your favourite for the bedroom? You can leave us a message on our adult shop contact us page or your can leave a comment below. We would really appreciate your feedback and input.

About Désir Intimate Collection

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Désir Intimate Collection is South Africa’s most exclusive online store, devoted to giving our clientele private access to the finest designer brands on the intimate luxury market. Headquartered in Camps Bay, Cape Town, Désir Online has one main goal – to help our customers find stronger intimacy, form closer relationships and build passionate love lives by dispelling the myths and social stigmas that prevent people from sensual exploration & expression.

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